“Did you smoke marijuana when you were young?” : how to answer your children the uncomfortable question.

Did you smoke marijuana when you were young? —. The question, which seems so innocent, can be uncomfortable for many parents and interpreted as an alarm for others. It's no wonder. As in the vast majority of countries in the world, marijuana is the most widely used psychoactive substance in Colombia among young people aged 18 to 24.

In fact, the National Study of Psychoactive Substance Use conducted by the Colombian Drug Observatory in 2019, stated that the percentage of people who perceive a high risk for marijuana use in Colombia, increases systematically with age. Thus, young people between the ages of 18 and 24 consider that the risk of smoking marijuana is often 82%, while adults between the ages of 45 and 85 believe that frequent use is 91.96% risky.

But one thing is what teenagers perceive and reality is another. A study titled Is the adolescent brain more vulnerable to the effects of cannabis? A narrative review of the evidence calls into question the effects of marijuana use during adolescent neurological development and ensures that it can cause structural and functional alterations that support long-term behavioral and psychological problems.

Given this, adults who may have made the decision to smoke marijuana can still take full advantage of the retrospective. They could say that they would have made a different decision if they had known what we now know about the adolescent brain's vulnerability to cannabis. Similarly, they could take the opportunity to point out how lucky they were that nothing went wrong, or to explain what happened.

The important thing, says India Vélez, a transpersonal psychologist at La casa de madera in Bogotá, is to tell it from humanity, because being a father is not about following a script because when “we trust that we live according to our principles of being and humanity with all that this implies, we will transmit it. We popes question us as a role model, when really what we can best show teenagers is our humanity, so that they have an example of how to find theirs.”

But often interpretations are taken in other ways and some parents think that addressing these issues is like asking for permission to experiment with drugs. So if this is a concern, some experts suggest addressing it head-on and saying “I tried marijuana, but I don't want you to think I'm saying it's okay. I want you to be smarter than I was.”

In that sense, it's not just about making the decision to tell the truth or hide it. It is about establishing a dialogue in which, on the basis of a testimony of life, the adolescent can make decisions responsibly and consciously. For this reason, Vélez suggests that “that question be an opportunity for parenting, where we know each other as human beings, because we are people who are in this world to be and grow together”.

On the contrary, if the adult has never used drugs or marijuana, what experts recommend is to remain in the same position of humanity above all else, because only when you answer from that place do relationships take hold. “The best way to ask them to trust us is for us to trust them. There are also things that you don't need to tell them at a young age, especially about those topics for which they are not prepared. The networks already talk to them a lot and if parents can help them understand these issues from their own experience, the better,” adds Vélez.

In this sense, raising awareness of the impact that psychoactive substances generate on young people can also be the subject of discussion, as research has shown that adolescents take the position of their parents very seriously, regardless of their position. In such a way, that there is no need for recommendations and guiding them along that path, warning them about the risks, it also helps, since safe and warm communication is the best tool to prevent them.

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